But the state of fandom even along the fringes as of late has had me all thinky about where I stand, and I came to the conclusion that a post like this was needed. Because it’s been too long since I’ve said all this. So in the spirit of clearing the air, a more up-to-date blanket statement for my own stance and journal...
I know things have gotten pretty rough with the SPN fandom sparring lately. So because it’s been a while since I’ve explicitly made this point which can get muddled in all my squee and rants, and because there’s a lot of new people floating around, I just want to state a few things to make clear where I stand.
For the record, I love this damn show inside out and backwards. Four damn years and still going strong. Whether I’m squeeing or ranting, drama queening or deep in meta, I do it because I love. And when I love a show so fully, it means I love everyone, every character, my God I even love John to itsy bitsy pieces. So I can’t begrudge you for your character loves. We all have our preferences which might skew our perceptions of each episode but that’s what makes us human, now doesn’t it? I like my diverse flist because it keeps me on my toes, and makes me see things I might have otherwise not seen or noticed, and all of that only adds to my enjoyment of the show, whether its squee or criticism.
I'll concede I do have the occasional habit of feeling bad when some people don’t get the squee that I get and get the urge to help fix it for them. Because I think, ‘WHEE! I’m all squeeful! I can make them squeeful too and then they’ll be happy too!’ It’s a stupid way to think though, because not much changes my viewpoint when I’m on a rant until I work it through myself, or we get more episodes that mellow me out again. So I apologize for those of you that might have been victim to this at all along the way.
I will admit that all these labels being thrown around lately just make my head spin. Because personally, I have never identified with these labels of Dean!girl or Sam!girl. If I really break it down, from the start of watching the show, what really made me turn my head was the character dichotomy between the two, so it‘s essentially the contrasts between the brothers that fuel the show for me. Over the years as characterizations have progressed, I have definitely had preferences for one character over another. But I have found that these preferences change fluidly depending on the way of the narrative. (I guess I could say I have a knee-jerk Dean identification as the older sister that I am, but with a natural Sam sympathy that comes with it, so I find myself harder on Dean, as one would be on one’s own self.) But both brothers stories have parts I have strongly identified with at different points in the show. Dean’s loyalty and familial responsibility. Sam’s struggle for personal identity and independence. I can see myself in each of them, their faults and flaws only emphasize that which I can see in myself, and so my sympathies go both ways. Yet I’ve also along the way come to love Ellen fiercely, adored Henriksen (and shook my pitchfork for the first time ever in this show when he died!), loved Bela (second pitchfork!), and am totally crossing my fingers Jo makes another returned appearance. And everyone knows my unhealthly obsession with the scoring. I’ll be first to admit part of my distance with Castiel comes from me not striking up a relatable point with him as of yet like I have with the boys. But I understand others could have the same problem with Dean or Sam or any of the other characters. And that doesn’t mean I don’t love Cas for all his doubt-y and hysterically deadpanning angelic ways anyway. :)
But it means sometimes it’s hard for me to remember, other people watch the show for other reasons. Just like I’m allowed to watch Castle just for Fillion‘s corny self. Fringe just for Josh Jackson‘s smile. Bones for the science vs. emotional contrasts. Dollhouse for the thinky thoughts. But that’s just me and my sentiments. Everyone has their own reasons for watching a show, and many factors are involved in it working for them from one week or season to another.
And it’s your journal so if you have a problem with an episode it’s your prerogative to post about it and voice your complaint, just as I did like the worry-warting drama queen I was for the most of Season Three. I’ve been there, I get it. And I don’t think you should at all feel bad about it. I feel I’ve mostly found my happy equilibrium for this show as of late, but just when I think I’ve got it all figured out, I’m sure Kripke will throw me a curveball.
I say all this precisely to make clear that I do not condone the hatred going around as of late. Disagreement is one thing. Criticism is one thing. Direct hatred for characters or especially groups of fans just brings everyone down, and while it happens as things like this always tend to do in fandom, I do not stand with it. In fact, I mostly just like to pull wool over my eyes, and stay away from it completely.
But, I also want to be clear: I will never be mad at you for not having the same opinion and viewpoint as me. In most cases, I’ll probably only love you more! All the different ideas you all bring to the table are half of what makes fandom so much better than just watching a show on your own and percolating in your own ideas. Besides, let’s be honest, have you seen me on initial reaction with this show? You all are the ones responsible for keeping me sane! :)
But in the end, we're all here because we love one of the characters, and whoever it is, they’d undoubtedly be fans of the others. So we really can’t begrudge any side right? So let’s all be nice and have some ice cream sundaes, yes? WHO WANTS CONES?! XD
*doles out the ice cream, chocolate and whipped cream to all*
I have one INSTA!FIC-REC to share this morning:
FIC: 'A Feast for Two at the Turquoise Dragon' [Sam, Cas]
This idea is TOTALLY personal canon to me now! How did Cas spend his time until his appointment with Dean in 5.04, you ask? Well, a theological and philosophical discussion with Sam on fate and free will at a Chinese restaurant at 5 in the morning, of course! And until I hear otherwise, no one is gonna tell me any differently. ;) But Kripke, you can still make it happen at any time and point this season.